Unnecessary Hesitation
by skyroy14
Summary: It's the eyes, she thinks. One-shot.


**This is for StarGirlPotter, because I'm horrible at time management and she's stuck with me on New Beginnings this long. So yeah. Also because she brought up the point of the lack of romantic stories for this pairing.**

 **Enjoy.**

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"Hermione?" She hears, as Ginny comes into view. Hermione receives a soft smile from the red-head, as Ginny leans against a bookshelf looking at her.

It's the eyes, she thinks.

At first, she thought she loved the brother. Not the smartest, not the sharpest, but loyal to the very end. Hermione could appreciate that.

It wasn't that Ron was horrible. Sure, he could be a bit of an ass, but he was kind at heart, and when push came to shove, he was one of her closest friends.

But Ginny's a different story.

Hermione didn't really think anything of her at first. She was Ron's little sister. Pretty in an objective way, but her presence didn't really resonate within Hermione the way Ron did, at least at that time. Hermione could see the similarities between the brother and sister. Loyal like her brother, not to mention kind at heart. Ginny had the same fiery red hair that made Hermione think of Fawkes rising from the ashes in a glorious display of power and passion.

They grew closer as they climbed in the years. Ginny was a great friend. Easy to laugh around and have fun with. Sure, Hermione had fun with Harry and Ron and if need be Hermione knew she could talk to them and they'd listen. Most times. But there was a difference between Harry and Ron, and Ginny. It wasn't that Ginny was a girl. It was just that Ginny always gave Hermione her rapt attention, like there wasn't anything else in the world to listen to. Hermione's words seemed to flow easier when she was with Ginny.

Sometimes they didn't even have to talk. Hermione loved the way that most days they could just sit in each other's presence, silent, and it was all they needed. It was peaceful in Hermione's otherwise chaotic world.

When they got older and Hermione no longer thought of Ginny as Ron's "kid sister", Hermione noticed the differences in Ginny and Ron.

Ron wanted status. He wouldn't leave his friends for elevation amongst his peers, but he tried so hard to be noticed. If it wasn't the shadows of his brothers and Ginny, it was the shadow of Harry weighing on Ron's shoulder. Hermione didn't blame Ron. He'd been average his whole life and wanted one moment where he wasn't a brother or a friend, but instead to be Ron Weasley. Hermione thinks that's part of the reason Ron joined the Quidditch team.

Ginny was different. She didn't need status. She knew her worth. Ginny didn't need to be extraordinary; she just needed to be Ginny. She could flick her wrist and have the Bat-Bogey Hex chasing bothersome Slytherins. She was actually interested in Quidditch and was passionate about playing and winning. It was because of Quidditch that Hermione started to notice the eyes. How they'd fill with mirth and the sort of Fawkes fire that made Hermione's gut clench with something new. Ginny loved the thrill of chasing someone on a broom, hundreds of feet above the ground. Hermione noticed the way Ginny's eyes became brighter with just a smile at the thought of winning a game or when a Bat-Bogey got its mark.

Hermione didn't know what the new feeling in her stomach meant. She tried to ignore the feeling as much as she could. She focused on her dwindling crush on Ron. Ron was too safe, too…boring. Hermione was boring enough herself, she wasn't afraid to admit. Well, boring by others' standards. Not everyone was excited about reading, about finding out the truth of things or how things worked. Hermione considered life a puzzle and she wanted all the help she could get to solve it. She knew not everyone saw it the same way.

Ginny didn't mind.

Her eyes lit up at a challenge, and Hermione loved that light.

No matter how she found herself feeling, she couldn't act on it. Wouldn't act on it. Hermione didn't want to drive away the one person that challenged her in a way that didn't make Hermione defensive. She didn't want to lose that light in those eyes.

Ginny liked Harry. Hermione could see that, could see the appeal. When she saw Lavender pull Ron into her arms, Hermione realized she didn't feel anything. No jealousy, no blazing anger. Rather, she became distressed at the knowledge that that didn't affect her, but that Ginny wouldn't ever feel the same way.

She stuck with her old crush of Ron for appearances sake. No one else was remotely interested in her anyway and she didn't want to make anyone suspicious.

The war stopped any feeling she had. Not just of Ginny, but of anyone else that wasn't Harry or Ron. She had to keep them alive, and not just because the two were very important to Ginny, but because she didn't want her friends to die. She didn't want this world to go down in darkness the way Voldemort envisioned. She put any and all thoughts from her mind that wasn't horcruxes, Harry and Ron, or Voldemort. Hermione had a job to do, and she wouldn't let anything get in the way.

Afterwards, when Voldemort was dead and Hogwarts lay in the rubble, Hermione let herself leave to go find her parents, and to hopefully find remnants of the little bushy haired girl she was before everything.

She couldn't stay with her parents often. They knew, knew what she'd done, what she'd been through. Hermione couldn't stand the variations of fear on her parents' faces. She left to the Weasley's, to visit Ron and Harry. To talk things out. They were more open now, more talkative. It wasn't until she had a nightmare one night that she remembered her feelings for Ginny. It wasn't Harry or Ron who rushed to her side in the dark, it was Ginny. Ginny who held Hermione close, hushing her and rubbing her arms and shoulders and telling her it would all be ok. Hermione let herself be held and let herself cry as she felt the old feelings crash back down.

She didn't know what to do. Harry and Ron joined the Aurors, but Hermione didn't want that. So she went back to school. It was strange to be one of the few going back. She wasn't the only one. There was Padma Patil who, like Hermione, wasn't ready for the world outside of Hogwarts. Justin Flinch-Fletchy wanted to redo the previous year in order to put it out of mind. Luna Lovegood came back because she wanted to. There was Draco Malfoy who just wanted to put the past in the past and start over. Hermione grew closer with the Returns. Even Malfoy held a civil conversation with her, despite the awkwardness.

None of them were Ginny though. Ginny would sit with Hermione in class and fool around in Charms and made Hermione laugh. Ginny would sit with Hermione in the library to do homework in the silence and the sunlight. Ginny would stay up and hold Hermione when she was crying and shaking and couldn't breathe.

Hermione noticed a change. She and Ginny hugged all the time, but now the hugs lingered. Ginny found excuses to tough Hermione on the arm or on the back, and Hermione would feel the touch scorch through her robes. Often Ginny grabbed Hermione's wrist in a delicate hold, her skin soft and warm, and Hermione would feel the touch still even after Ginny had long let go.

Ginny was the one that acted. Ginny had taken Hermione flying on a broom one night when the shaking and the crying got really bad, and Ginny said that fresh air would do good. It was after the flying, when they lay on the ground looking up at the sky that Ginny had pushed their heads close together and sealed her lips over Hermione's. Her kiss was like her touch, soft and warm. Hermione could feel the feather light touch of Ginny's fingers on her cheek, could feel her thumb swipe back and forth.

For the first time since the war, Hermione was genuinely happy. She didn't have as many nightmares. They stayed up late just holding each other or talking. The relationship didn't change. They could still sit in silence and have rousing arguments that meant nothing. The only difference was that Hermione could feel Ginny's heart speed up much like hers when Hermione kissed her. She could hear the hitch in her breath when she got close.

Looking at Ginny now, with the soft look in her eyes as she looked at Hermione, she remembered all of these things and smiled. Wide and happy.


End file.
